Waiting for seven years to have a child after marriage, a popular Ghanaian actor, Mr Adjetey Anang, shared his experience of battling infertility with the media, revealing that it was one of the trying times of their marriage.
“There were times when there was so much hope, and there were other times you would ask yourself, what is it that you are doing wrong as a Christians?’ There was a lot of pressure on us, and it was very tough,” he disclosed.
“Times were when we were invited to outdooring (baby naming ceremonies) among other occasions and we found it difficult to attend because people would see you and say, ‘We are praying for you.”
“All of that was not easy at all for us, but we kept hoping and hoping, and here we are today, blessed with a baby boy.”
The story of the actor is an example of the pressures and stigma people with infertility issues go through in society, having to endure all these and do whatever they can to have their own biological children.
Infertility and its causes
Fertility experts say infertility is the inability of a woman to become pregnant or a man to make a woman pregnant after one year of unprotected and regular sexual intercourse.
Dr Edem Hiadzi, an obstetrician-gynaecologist and fertility specialist, says five percent of all cases of infertility are unknown, while 40 percent can be attributed to either the woman or the man, and 15 percent being a combination of problems from both partners.
Infertility can be primary or secondary.
Primary infertility is when either a man or a woman has never given birth before, while secondary infertility is when one might have gotten pregnant in the past but is unable to do so presently.
Factors that can contribute to infertility include poor nutrition, untreated sexually transmitted diseases, unsafe abortions, infections from female genital mutilation, smoking, fibroids, and blockage.
Fertility specialists say untreated infections, especially sexually transmitted ones such as HIV, chlamydia, and gonorrhoea, account for a chunk of primary infertility cases in women, while prolonged labour can also lead to secondary infertility, as it can cause pelvic infections after delivery, which could block the fallopian tubes.
Infertility in men
“A barren woman is like a leaking pot,” and “A woman is a stranger until she gives birth to a child.”
These African proverbs show the importance of childbirth in the African society and blame barrenness on the woman, as it is the woman’s stomach that protrudes to show a couple’s fertility.
Dr Frank Ewusie Brown, Consultant/ Obstetrician and Gynaecologist at the Presby Hospital, Donkorkrom, says it is unfair to blame women for barrenness as there is more to fertility than a man getting an erection.
“Sometimes men believe that once I can penetrate a woman and ejaculate, I am fertile, and that’s a big fallacy, as infertility in men can be caused by the absence of sperm production as a man can achieve erection, penetration, and ejaculation, but there is no sperm in the semen.”
He said there were instances where, even when there were sperms available, their quality was so poor that they cannot penetrate an egg and cause fertilisation, explaining that pregnancy was a process that contains a lot of stages of natural fertilisation.
“The woman must produce the egg called ovaries, and the man must produce potent sperm with capacity. Sometimes sperms can be produced without capacity; they are frozen; they can’t move; I call them stressed sperms, and if a sperm cannot move, it cannot penetrate and fertilise the egg.”
Stigmatization of childless couples
Stigma comes in many forms when dealing with childless couples, from the traditions and cultures of Africa, which see the ultimate purpose of marriage as procreation, the inability to give birth is seen as unacceptable and abnormal.
The churches also fuel stigma against childless couples in scriptures such as Psalm 127:3-4: “Children are a heritage from the Lord, offspring a reward from him. Like arrows in the hands of a warrior are children born in one’s youth.”
These are used as bases to frequently call such couples to the alter to be prayed for, exposing their plight to all the congregants.
Dr Ebenezer Tetteh Kpalam, a Clinical Psychologist and Pastor of the Church of Pentecost, says stigmatising couples who have infertility challenges can cause depression, as the couples, especially the women, already have a lot of psychological issues to deal with.
He said stigmatisation within the Ghanaian society came in the form of overly celebration of naming ceremonies and other gatherings, which cause a lot of anxiety for the couple grappling to have a child, and fear of the comments people will make about them when they attend such ceremonies.
He observed that loneliness and rejection through ridiculing by society, including family, in-laws, and friends, contribute to stigmatisation.
Also “religious people, especially Christian women who have infertility issues, sometimes suffer some form of psychological issues due to the feeling of guilt, believing that God is punishing them for some sin they might have committed,” Dr Kpalam said.
“It sometimes becomes traumatising when people trivialise the issue, especially at church, making them feel like faithless women, who have not prayed enough, mostly when others give testimonies on how they prayed and got children.
Overcoming infertility
Couples battling for the fruit of the womb have been encouraged to seek early treatment together, which makes it easier to get solutions rather than leaving the woman alone to seek care.
Alternatives to childbirth such as artificial insemination, adoption, and surrogacy, can be accessed by the couples, while young women who are not ready to give birth for one reason or another can take advantage of freezing their quality eggs to use when they are ready.
Egg freezing is a form of assisted reproductive technology that involves stimulating, harvesting, and storing eggs for future use.
Conclusion
Even though childbirth is important in the preservation of the human race, people who are finding it difficult to have children of their own must not be stigmatised, as shaming them ends up compounding their woes.
Society must bear in mind that these people seeking the fruit of the womb have tried countless times, drinking concoctions, and visiting places believed to have spiritual fertility powers, among other things.
Therefore, shaming them steals their mental sanity and pushes them into solitude and psychological illness, including depression and anxiety.
Family and friends must support such couples with love and care even as they seek medical assistance to cure the condition, rather than stigmatising them.
Couples suffering childlessness must also find joy in their situation by adopting and caring for vulnerable children, using the time to bond more, and impacting on their own lives and that of the society.
Being a mother or father goes beyond just giving birth, knowing that there is much more to offer society irrespective of one’s ability or otherwise to have his or her own biological child.
By Laudia Sawer
Source: GNA
