“If there is cause to hate someone, the cause to love has just begun.” – Wolof proverb
We celebrated the essence of love on Valentine’s Day and we were all reminded of what is most important in our lives: the desire to love and be loved. It is not just within for some of us; it is within all of us. This notion of love whether it is the ‘fairy fantasy,’ or the ‘divine command’ quakes in our awakenings. On a daily basis, we talk about it, sing about it, and we write about it. It is what comes naturally to us. Why? We were created with love and in love. We are conceived in love, birthed in love and nurtured in love. In fact we are lovers. Is it any wonder that we are all experts on love?
Taking a clue from this premise, every mention of love, reminds us of who we really are – lovers. Our daily thrive is centred on giving love and receiving love. Our virtues emanate from it, and our vices, an absence of it. Love is our transcended nature, we are marinated in it. Its function in our being is more important than the air we breathe. We are gifted with it, but we cannot keep it to ourselves. We have to gift it to others in other to be aware of it. That is why it is a lot easier to experience love than to define it. The best shot we have had at defining love is to create drama around it. We have taken the simplicity of love and woven complex imageries around it to confuse ourselves.
In its simplest form, love is us and we are love. It unveils our individuality to ourselves as similar to each other. It breaks down barriers, and bonds us to each other. Love expands us and strengthens us to help us perfect ourselves. It gives us wings to soar above ourselves, invigorating us to wish for the good of ourselves and others. It flattens the undulating pathways of our relationships, respecting the differences that mould our individualities in order to create equality amongst us. That is why it is possible to love someone whom you disagree with. Love touches us through our words and actions. It is active in us all the time.
Often times we think love in terms of varying emotions, in terms of our passions, and our sensations. We think of it in terms of the commitments and the goodwill we feel when we are attracted to another person. Love is bigger than that. Love is a celebration in the mystery of life. It is the presence of life within us. It is the matter that fills the spaces of our masses. You are love enfleshed. Whiles we live, we do not accomplish a representation of living. No. Rather we accomplish love in motion. We undertake a pouring out of the love we are made of, for others to experience. Living is love’s time within us. It is love made present in words and actions for the thrive of all of us.
We exist in love. It is why we often love without feeling it. It is love that drives our stories; the stories of our relationships, our achievements, our sacrifices and our appreciations. Love does not reveal itself in pomp and power, but rather in responsiveness and liberality. We love not because we seek love in return, even though it is wonderful to be loved in return. Rather we love in order to encounter and share in the joys of others; and to confront their sufferings with intentions to alleviate them.
Love is not a choice we have to make, it is what we ought to be and do. Every time we fail to love, we initiate an imbalance in life. We take away the support base and plant hopelessness. We activate uncertainty, we cause pain and we invite despair to accompany us on the journey. Love is the real antidote to the challenges around us. When we love, we courageously open ourselves up. We touch others and we become heralds of hope, care, forgiveness, joy, responsibility, assurance, appreciation, respect, knowledge, faith, trust and many more things in order to make life beautiful and worth living. In fact, love jolts us out of our observatory mood and gets us involved in creating meaning. She immerses us in the reality of life, adorning us with compassion, tenderness and solidarity to make our humanity enchanting.
When we love, our consciousnesses are converted to justice, simplicity and beauty. They work to uplift human dignity, generating means of ending discrimination and abuse in the world. Love invariably and exclusively enlivens us to be builders of the world, to work for a better world. But love is not as rosy as it sounds and feels. She takes a lot out of us through the sacrifices she burdens us with. Often times the load weighs us down and we encounter the difficulty of loving. But love urges us on because you are the only means by which she can express herself.
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Kodwo Brumpon is a partner at Brumpon & Kobla Ltd, a forward-thinking Pan African management consultancy and social impact firm driven by data analytics, with a focus on understanding the extraordinary potential and needs of organisations and businesses to help them cultivate synergies, that catapults into their strategic growth, and certifies their sustainability.
Comments, suggestions, and requests for talks and training should be sent to him at kodwo@brumponand kobla.com
